1. |
the death of...
00:05
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no one will know the music is dead because we killed it
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2. |
EXiLED
03:02
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I spent the last year in exile try-
ing to pull myself up out
of this shit, before I
drown, myself
There are people in this world who
sincerely wish that I
did drown myself and
cease, to exist
but if I believed what they believe is the
truth about me, then I
promise you, I promise you that
I, would too
but I don't really wanna talk about
any of that shit, no
I just miss
my, Grandma
For nearly 30 years she was my mom, and for
nearly 30 years I was another
undeserving son, I
was, a lucky one.
I spent 27 trying to
be a pro gamer, OH LOOK AT ME!
and I spent 28 truly
living, the dream
But 29 was the worst GOD DAMN YEAR
I have lived so far! and with the
snap of a hand, I lost myself and I
lost, so many more
I've done such a good job, such a such a good job
self medicating, by
repressing, escaping, and
drinking, drinking, drinking
I don't like
who I've been, and
I don't like,
who I am
but YOU CAN'T STOP TRYING NO MATTER WHAT THEY SAY, so
I'll keep on trying.....
to be the one that I wanted to be, to
be the one she always thought I was, to
be the one that I still hope that I can become.
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3. |
Beercan
01:50
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just be cause life is a
bummer man, does
not mean that you
have to go to done-zo land
I've been here before, fuck I'll
be here again
I just gotta hang in there
it'll work now it worked, back
then
I end near-ly all nights, in a
beer can, so
I don't feel much of
anything anymore, and I
don't wanna be here,
no, I don't wanna be here
I wanna be anywhere else,
anywhere else, but I
can't
I don't wanna be
I don't wanna be me
I don't wanna be
me, anymore, any
more
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4. |
Totemtown
02:46
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Are we going to Totemtown? Where the wolves are friendly
and I am not alone
I'll take off my bandit mask and pretend that I am part of the pack
because I don't wanna be alone
Well the Buffalo roams where I wanna go
but I've never been where the buffalo go
about these things I do not know
I can not know what I don't know but
Vicariously I've lived it all
been to the southern bay and the Eden wall
the screaming elephant he said to me
"Ya know, it really ain't that bad to be alone"
rturtfgbvwasd totemtown
Well the screeching hawk it rages on
with the jealous veins it thrives upon
peers straight through the veil and soars on down now
to grasp that trophy that I have found and
It justifies the virus filled crack
Encouraging every self destructive act
the crippled sloth whispers upon my ear that
it's hard to get use to being alone
Totemtown's brown with a church painted red and burn like hell it shall not fail
Totemtown burns just like everything burns for the duration of my existance
for the deceivery of REDACTED
Totemtown shines with rust and grime and to dirt you shall return to remain as dirt
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5. |
Caterpillar
04:06
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I don't know if I could live anymore
and I still don't understand how you ever left this morgue
and I know that I knew that one day it'd come true
and this caterpiller will have one day flew
Far away to the northern coast
and leave me all alone, here in this morgue
and I know that I knew that one day it'd come true
and I'd finally learn the truth
about me -- ooooooo-woooooahh-wooooooahhhh
so I hate myself for all that I am every hair follicle and ev-er-y carbon based at-om
so I hate myself for who I've become because of the wrongs they've allowed me to have done
I deserve be alone in this frigid iced drawer after that look in your eyes, I belong here in this morgue
I've always been honest yet I have never spoke the truth so how can I ever expect someone to ever love me true?
when I don't love myself like Deborah loves her Brother (dexter reference) I'll be all alone oh I'll always be alone
but atleast I can take some solace in this pain that is all mine
cause it truely is all mine for it is unique to me
and no one will ever know what it's like to be me
despite our similarities I promise that we are all unique
I can leave my house and go from one coast to the other
but it will not change a thing because every city's just the same just
another carbon copy of woes I left behind suffocating and erradicating all of my kind
and here I am oh once again
prepared to learn what I learned before
that we're all monsters atleast sometimes
breaking bad season 3 episode 1
"how do you not hate yourself?"
"I did hate myself, for a long time. but it didn't stop me from drinking and getting high; it just made it that much worse. Self-hatred and guilt, it accomplishes nothing; it just stands in the way"
"Stands in the way of what?"
"True change"
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6. |
Surgical Extraction
01:43
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everyday I wake up just in time to watch the sun go down
everyday i wake up with no meaning to be found
everyday I wake up, it's not as pleasant as it sounds
and I don't want to wake up anymore in my hometown
so I'll grab my guitar
and put it in the trunk of my car
and I'll drive far far FAR away from here
until the gas I can no longer afford
so I will walk fifty five more
until my feet are sore sore sore
and when day becomes night
you will all transform
and these mirages of friendship
are all gone
Yes, these mirages of friendship
are gone gone gone
and from this surgical extraction
I guess I'll crawl home
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7. |
Unemployable
03:58
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my best friend told me today
that he would never hire me at
the minimum wage job that
he manages
cause my perspective conflicts with his with
regards to being a working stiff you see
I know my job and I ain't we because
I sold 20k and only made seventy... two. (BEFORE TAXES OF COURSE) -- (he says his)
Job's not about making coffee it's about
connecting with the people cause when
you give them half your attention you make them
fee-eel revered, he says -------
it's not about the gratuity, suuuure ;)
it's about being genuine he says
anyone who has to fake it
is unemployable, he says that
I am unemployable, he says that
despite all my tours
I lack all these skills, he says that
I don't know how to be a human being, cause I
know a bed ain't the only place you can live out your dreams, and I re-
fuse to climb the cor-poor-ate ladder, emphasis on poor -- I retort
I was born in the usa
I was born in the usa
i don't wanna be another cog in the machine
i don't believe in the american dream, I said
i don't wanna be another cog in the machine
i don't believe in the american dream
so you can live the 9 2 5 lyfe 4 life
and maybe by the end of it you can go buy some imp-
lanted false memories of a life you forgot live, and try to
erase the broken record you did, now for some unsolicited advice! don't
eat sleep work consume rep-
eat sleep work consume rep-
eat sleep work consume rep-
eat sleep work consume rep-
eat sleep work consume rep-
eat sleep work consume rep-
(broken record)
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8. |
Legend at 27
04:35
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I'm gonna be a legend one day but
first I'll have to die
I'm gonna be a legend you'll see but
first I'mma have to die, we
take for granted everyone who's alive and
after they die we will romanticize, our
relationships with them, and we'll
claim we were their friend -- when in
reality we chose not to
make time for them, and
I know I am guilty
more than a little convicted
I don't know about you, but I'm feelin' pretty guilty
I'm gonna be a legend one day but
first I'll have to die
I'm gonna be a legend you'll see but
first I'mma have to die, we
embellish all the tales that we tell about ourselves, and by the
end of our lives ooh, we can not even tell, cause we're
afraid that they won't care, about the
things we have to share so we over
state the truth so that they won't for-
get about us, cause we
don't wanna be forgotten, we
all wanna be remembered, so we
lie through our teeth, cause
we're all liars
more than a little dishonest
I don't know about you, but I'm a gosh dang liar
I'm gonna be a legend one day but
first I'll have to die
I'm gonna be a legend you'll see but
first I'mma have to die, and
I'm gonna be a legend one day but
27 is not the age
we all consume these vices so that we don't wanna die
quite as much as we always do
sometimes I wish that I were rich so someone would wanna marry me to
release me from all lifes worries, and put me out of my misery (by which I mean)
they would devise a plan to-oooo murder me, and
make it look like suicide and inherit the almighty money, but
I don't wanna die, I'm just sick of being alive
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9. |
End Boss
04:20
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kind of live my life but just enough to get by, just
enough where others claim I'm alive, and I
feel like I'm just a passenger, in
side this hollow cranium, and, I
passively watch from behind my eyes
all these actions that I wish were a lie, but I
treat myself, my friends, and my family, so
god damned reprehensibly and that
very well may be an accurate depiction of the
truth, about me, I
am nothing more than a scavenger, hide-
ing behind this bandit mask and I
hope that one day I, can re
gain, some control, oooohh-
ver the scales responsible for my
chemical imbalances cause
I AM THE END BOSS
I AM THE END BOSS
I AM THE END BOSS (self defeating, Self defeat me)
I AM THE END BOSS (help me defeat me and)
Please Love Me Please Love Me, I
wish that I could Love Me, I wish that I could learn to love myself even
though I'm not a/the person that I am proud to be, it
does not mean that I shouldn't strive to be
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10. |
the end of an era
00:16
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Self Proclaimed Narcissist
DIY Folk-Punk // Anti-Folk // Honesty Folk from Oregon.
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